The Secret Sex Lives of Romeo and Juliet

Hamlet/Horatio begins on an empty sound stage with the death of Hamlet. The action transpires in his last moment of awareness as the hero of Shakespeare's most famous play watches his life flash before him while his soul transcends all earthly conflict. Hamlet/Horatio is told from the perspective of Hamlet's closest friend and confidante, Horatio, who takes on the role of film director in order to fulfill his promise to dying Hamlet of telling the story of Hamlet's life so that the world will know of Hamlet's tragic sacrifice.

When Ambrosia, the pastor's cook, leaves the village for a while to give birth to the child she is expecting from the pastor in a secluded place, the buxom and love-struck Irma takes her place in the parish. And soon she too is looking forward to the joys of motherhood. But who is the father of the child? The curate she seduced, or even the pastor himself...?

An all-knowing interlocutor guides us through a series of affairs in Vienna, 1900. A soldier meets an eager young lady of the evening. Later he has an affair with a young lady, who becomes a maid and does similarly with the young man of the house. The young man seduces a married woman. On and on, spinning on the gay carousel of life.

An alcoholic ex-football player drinks his days away, having failed to come to terms with his sexuality and his real feelings for his football buddy who died after an ambiguous accident. His wife is crucified by her desperation to make him desire her: but he resists the affections of his wife. His reunion with his father—who is dying of cancer—jogs a host of memories and revelations for both father and son.

Disciplined Italian composer Antonio Salieri becomes consumed by jealousy and resentment towards the hedonistic and remarkably talented young Salzburger composer Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.